Hello all, it's been awhile and I sorry but life seems to get in the way of blogging. However, today I feel the real need to write, probably as some kind of catharsis that I need. You see, today, Contessa and I had to put down our beloved miniature poodle Max. Max was born April 21, 1998 in Missouri and we bought him and gave him a home on August 3, 1998. He lived with us non stop from August 3, 1998 until earlier today when we had him put down as a final act of love that is only a drop in the bucket so to speak as compared to the unconditional love he provided to us all those years. Yes, he was sixteen years old and lived with us just short of fifteen years and eleven months. Max came into our lives at a difficult time. My dad had died March 28, 1998 and needless to say it was a tough time for all of us. I remember April being the saddest part of my life but little did I know that during that time a breeder in Missouri's dog called Dave's Misty had given birth to a multi coloured poodle who would join us and put smiles on all our faces just a few short months later. Contessa and I had discussed getting a dog, in fact we bought our condo on condition it allowed pets. We just happened to walk into a pet store at a mall we didn't go that often after I had bought some shoes at Roots. She saw a little poodle in a cage barking away as he wanted to join in the fun two other little puppies were having. She said, there's a poodle (we needed a poodle as both of us are allergic to dog fur dander and poodles have hair, not fur). I remember saying, he looks freaky with all those colours, must have been the runt of the litter. He also cost a ton and money was a little tighter in those days. Anyway, we had him brought to the play area and my wife was smart, she had me hold him. He looked at me with his big eyes and licked my face. I was smitten but the cost still was high and I was always told not to buy from a pet store, just a breeder. My wife knew he would be our dog but I said not ready, let's see if we can get a dog from a breeder. She made a few calls to no avail and we agreed to take a drive the next day and talk about it. The fact we had already named the poodle in the store Max kind of tells you how that conversation went. Anyway, on the long weekend Monday we drove back to the mall and she went in first, with me being afraid of seeing her in tears if someone else had snatched up our dog. Nope, there he was running around the play area with her, I joined in and he pulled my shoe laces. We bought him with my wife financing him on her Visa. We took him home and other than babysitting with grandma or auntie, he has never left our side. I can still see him running through the house on running spells, his first hair cut where my wife almost cried he was so cute. Hand feeding him at first as he was a social eater to some extent, his first walk around the neighbourhood with our being the proudest parents around. Funniest was my wife saying once, he's asleep let me see if I can walk by him without him hearing, not knowing of course that dogs hear EVERYTHING. Anyway, days grew into weeks, into months and years. He was so embedded in the family that he had birthday parties, received congrats on passing puppy school and never missed a family dinner where he got to sit on grandma's lap after everyone had finished eating. He was the family dog, the family grandchild so to speak and put a smile on my mom's face that had been absent since my dad had died. He filled a void. Five years after we gave Max a home, his human brother Brandon was born. Needless to say we were worried he might feel a little jealous and I tried to ensure Max still got the attention he deserved. He was never jealous although when we brought his brother home and he was on the ground in his car seat carrier, Max went up to him, sniffed him, then pulled back, then sniffed again and figure oh ok, he is in the family but I get to sleep in the room in bed with mom and dad, sucker. Max became a close companion to his brother, always appearing in pictures, never far away when Brandon was playing on the floor, and even looking out for him. Once when Brandon was in his swing and couldn't lift his head, Max sensed something was wrong and ran into the kitchen where grandma was and started barking. Of course he was saying, um my brother needs you, come help him. I remember Max barking about 10 seconds before feeling an Earthquake, barking at Osama Bin Laden on tv after September 11, 2001. So many memories, how he loved the infrequent snow we get and how he would sit under his brother's high chair waiting for food to fall from heaven (he gained a couple of lbs at that time). Of course, he started slowing down as he aged, and in August 2006, we found out he had a heart murmur (he had been coughing a little). Needless to say it was devastating and we figured his days were numbered especially after he went on heart medication in January 2007. I figured he would not live that year but we along with the vet managed his heart issued and he continued to have a happy life. He had monthly vet visits where his progress was checked and even after adding additional medications in 2010 I believe, he continued to live a happy life. After he turned 15 he started losing a little weight but no biggie although it continued. We never knew how long he had but were happy with each milestone, another family birthday, xmas, another birthday for him. In November 2013, we found out that he had a growth in his bladder that was operable but given his heart, really wasn't if you know what I mean. My wife and I decided that his quality of life was important and we were going to keep him happy as long as we could. He remained on low fat diets to combat his pancreatitis which we had beaten and began wearing doggy diapers to stop from going in the house (he was really cute and on the cutting edge of fashion as walked around the house in them). He turned 16 on April 21, 2014 and as we had for the last few birthdays, had a party for him knowing it might be his last although we had said that for the last few and he always found a way to come back for one more. However, that did prove to be his last one. He started turning away from his food a few weeks ago so we tried other food and for awhile he gobbled it up but about a week ago it was getting harder to get him to take any food. We did some blood and urine tests on him and found out he had very bad kidneys mostly from being old. There was nothing really we could do as fixing the kidney would hurt the heart etc. We found that out on Sunday and by late Monday he wouldn't eat anything and rapidly went downhill. We knew what we had to do. It was not easy seeing his brother crying knowing that the dog that has been part of his entire life would no longer be there. He said his goodbyes today and Contessa and I took him to the vet tonight to say our goodbyes. The vet told us it was inevitable and we were doing the right thing but many times doing the right thing hurts more than doing the wrong thing. As we gave him our last hugs and told him what a great dog he was, we called the vet in who humanely ended his life. Max's last action was to open his mouth and go bleh re the anesthetic taste much like he did when we was biting furniture and tasted bitter apple. Then it was over. We hugged him one last time, thanked the vet for all his amazing care over the years and Max was taken away. His body might be gone but his spirit will live with us forever. It hurts a ton right now, I wish I could hold him right now and of course, would do anything to have him back with us, but not the way he was the last few days. When we found out he had the bladder issue, I told the vet that I did not want to have him around when he wasn't "Max". The vet understood. The last couple of days he wasn't Max. No tail wagging, no running to see me at the door, no barking at the TV etc. He was telling us it was time. I always wondered how I would know it was time and people told me, you just will. They were right. No one will ever love a dog more than we loved Max, no one will ever do more for a dog than we did for Max. However, all the money spent on special food, monthly grooming, pet supplies, treats, vets is nothing compared to the unconditional love and companionship he gave us over the years. We could never repay Max for that. We are are so in debt to him, it is beyond belief. We learn a lot from our companion animals, unconditional love, not to be judgmental, to love others more than we love ourselves etc. Max gave us all that. He truly loved his brother, his mother, his grandmother, his aunt and me more than he loved himself. He even made the final decision easy for us as he knew I was having doubts earlier in the week. He said don't worry dad, it is ok, I have had a great life, thank you. No Max, THANK YOU for everything. RIP Max April 21, 1998-June 25, 2014.